This week’s Flash Fiction Friday is another one based on a prompt I found on Pinterest. This one is built on the premise that everyone but you has a guardian angel. Instead, you have a guardian demon who deals with things in more violent but much more efficient fashion. It sounded interesting, so let’s see where this goes.

~~~

“Did you really have to do that?” I pointed to the corpse with his burned-out eyes and open mouth, which had, just seconds ago, been releasing a lot of noise. A lot of hot air too. Seriously, he should have known no one could reason with a demon. I’d figured it out ages ago. Hadn’t taken me more than a few hours after he showed up.

“He was a danger to you.”

“Azariel, he just wanted my wallet.”

“I know humans and their dark intentions, little girl. I’ve been around a few times. Seen things you couldn’t even imagine.” Azariel examined his sharp, curving claws with a sniff. “He would’ve done much worse than steal your wallet.”

“Thanks for that image.” I gagged and turned away from the corpse. “But you can’t murder everyone who comes after me!”

“Why not? I’m not an angel, pet. I’m a demon, and demons create havoc, destroy things, and lead humans astray.”

I groaned and shook my head. “Remind me again why you’re here? I never asked for a guardian—angel or demon—but I certainly would’ve chosen anything but you.”

“Such bratty behavior for someone who would’ve died if I hadn’t stepped in.” Azariel smiled at me and flicked my wayward bangs out of my eyes. “Really, Ash, would it kill you to be grateful? I know I’m supposed to encourage greed and all other banal, wicked attitudes in humans, but I have feelings too. I’d appreciate a little bit of thankfulness for saving your life.”

Azariel,” I drawled. “You have been leaving a trail of corpses behind you since we met a month ago. I’m going to end up in jail as a serial killer, and my life will basically be over anyway. Can you pleasejust let me handle things and, I don’t know, buzz off?”

“That would be boring.”

“You’re thousands of years old. You don’t need me to amuse you. Find some other human to toy with. I don’t need the devil’s protection.”

Azariel pursed his lips. “Well, it’s all you’ve got right now.”

“And I’m telling you, I don’t want it. I know the cost associated with it way too well.” I grimaced, hating that I couldn’t get him off my back. Really, I’d seen what contracting with demons resulted in, and I didn’t want any part. Maybe I might not have a guardian angel, but I could live with that. God could decide when I went, guardian angel, demon, or whatever. Not like anything was going to stop Him, and I didn’t want anything to do with this demon since it seriously increased my chances of ending up dead.

Azariel had been silent for too long. He looked like he was in pain, but then the expression flashed away, replaced with the usual smugness he projected. “What if I said I’d stop being your guardian demon?”

“On what conditions? My immortal soul?” I crossed my arms. “Come on, Azariel, what do you take me for? A fool?”

“Well… You did almost let that man—”

I raised a hand. “Enough. I get the idea. What will I have to give you in return for getting rid of you? Hmm? My firstborn child?”

Azariel shivered in disgust. “Good gods, no. What would I do with a baby? Eat it?”

I gagged. “Seriously? That’s the first thing you come up with?”

He shrugged with an innocent smile. “I’m a demon? Generally, my first idea is the most violent one.”

Unbelievable. “What. Do. You. Want?”

“Well, I’m not going to leave. But I’ll stop being your guardian demon.”

I face-palmed. “That doesn’t get rid of you.”

“Nope. But it does exonerate you of the price you’d have to pay for my guardianship.”

I stalked off down the alley. “Stupid demons. I’m going to snap his neck like a twig one of these days, I swear.”

“I heard that.”

Well, good. He was supposed to.

~~~

Well, that’s it for this week’s Flash Fiction Friday. Hope you enjoyed it. As always, if you have something you’d like to see here, feel free to reach out in the comments or by email!

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